


Your Heart In Mind

by ohnotaziaa



Series: Before I Close My Eyes At Night [1]
Category: Sekai-ichi Hatsukoi
Genre: BL, Blowjobs, M/M, Smut, but with more porn ig, porn with plot?, takaritsu
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-14
Updated: 2018-07-14
Packaged: 2019-06-10 06:11:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 898
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15285411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohnotaziaa/pseuds/ohnotaziaa
Summary: Sometimes words aren't enough to get his feelings across. Sometimes they're too much.





	Your Heart In Mind

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Kitty_84](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kitty_84/gifts).



_After just a little, little bit longer. Just like the ever-present rain, as it continues to fall down all around._  
  
"Onodera." he said, breath hot against the other's bare skin. "I love you."   
  
Before he could say another word, Ritsu's lips pressed hard against his.

"I know." was his answer, even though what he really meant was-  
  
  

"You're so beautiful." Takano's voice sent a thrill through him.  
  
Lips slowly brushed against his inner thighs, inching towards the places Takano knew were sensitive.

He didn't know what to think, all he knew was that the man above him knew so much more about him than he did himself. Was this love?

Was it lust?

"Takano-san, s...stop now...!"   
  
To him, stop meant go; To him, actions spoke louder than words. He'd said it before, hadn't he? Takano wanted all of him, body and soul. But did he know, how Ritsu wanted him? How he craved him? To touch him, to kiss him...  
  
_Do you love me?_

"Onodera." his voice was full of nothing but emotion. "Touch me?"  
  
It was more of a command than a request, but Ritsu wanted to take the lead this time, anyway. He wanted to convey these feelings, even if through action for now. He wanted so desperately to say it.  
  
_Why can't I love you?_

Takano suckled gently on his lower lip, kisses soft and sensual. His lips glided down across Ritsu's skin; he licked his ear, causing him to flinch.   
  
Protests grew quieter and quieter, as if admitting to the pleasure Ritsu knew himself that he was feeling.

_Do I want this?_

But the more he thought about it, the more he began to doubt. So what if he loved him, so what if he wanted to be with him? There's more that comes after, no matter how much they fantasize. This was the real world and they weren't kids anymore, so why-  
  
"Ritsu."  
  
-why did he hold him so gently? Calling him with that sweet voice, as if he were something precious...  
  
_I'm not fragile, I won't break._

"Ah!"  
  
_I'm not fragile._  
  
Kisses moved down his neck, down to his chest, and he moaned gently at the sensation of Takano's tongue. His mind wandered as the other's hands moved further down to unbuckle his belt, and Ritsu flinched in response.

"Wait." He sat up, stopping Takano's hands.  
    
"What?"  
  
"I..." the words wouldn't come out.  
  
They never did.  
  
_He'll sigh again, he'll take the lead. He doesn't mind as much as he wants to. He won't show it._

"Just...tell me."  
  
Ritsu gulped, shyly, and Takano almost felt guilty for finding it sultry.  
  
"I want to try...again this time."  
  
_Is this enough? Will he get what I mean?_  
  
Sitting against the wall, Takano spread his legs out enough so that Ritsu could position himself in between. It was more nerve wracking than usual, especially in such a vulgar position, and the shaky breaths that spilled from Ritsu's lips unintentionally made his partner shiver.   
  
"...Ritsu. You're killing me here."  
  
"...!"  
  
Interrupting himself, he clenched his eyes shut and put his mouth over Takano.

"Ngh...!"  
  
The responding grunt startled Ritsu, and he looked up to see if he did something wrong, but-  
  
_When you make that face, as if letting your guard down around me..._  
  
He repeated his previous motions, wrapping his lips over the entire length and pulling back. He'd bore his tongue into the tip of Takano's dick while squeezing the base with his fingers, teasingly.  
  
_Does this feel good? Am I doing it right?_

He was scared to ask, but Takano unconsciously knew what he was thinking. 

"Yes, Ritsu, right there..."  
  
He felt himself blush hard.   
  
Recalling the last time when he nearly choked, Ritsu tested his limits again and pushed his mouth down farther over Takano, eliciting a sharp groan from him, and bobbed his head slowly. He couldn't help but wonder if Takano was really enjoying this...Thinking that he couldn't do it for much longer, jaw slacked and tired, Takano pushed on him with more force.  
  
"...Ritsu, I'm..."  
  
_Wait, huh..?_  
  
He pressed a hand to Ritsu's forehead, his mouth releasing him with a 'pop', and then went rigid.   
  
Emerald eyes fluttered after the surprise of Takano's release.  
  
"Ah, sorry. I'll get a wipe...Though, I guess this is payback."  
  
"S...Stop being so dirty!"  
  
Takano was more confused that the man ahead of him, covered in his semen, was embarrassed by a few tease words, more than anything else, but he laughed anyway, wiping him clean and kissing his forehead. "Stop being so cute."  
  
From the glint in his lover's eyes after that, Ritsu knew it was going to be a long night. He sighed indignantly, but to no avail, already pushed down on his back. 

_So much for sleeping early._

 

But when it really came down to things, it was hard to tell what kind of love they'd been facing. Love, or lust? But it didn't really matter--There was more to love than a simple checkers board, there were many aspects to it--lust was just a factor. Ritsu knew this, and he used it as a means to hold off on the words he was longing, clinging, to say.  
  
"I know."  
  
A kiss as a substitute--an interruption, just so that one day, he'd be comfortable enough to tell him,  
  
"Me too."  
  
_I love you, too._

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for continuing to read this shit! It's like 12am(now it's 2am) so it might be trash, I'm sorry ;; By the time I post this, it will have been read it over already, hopefully, though...Please let me know how I did/Give feedback!  
> Taz


End file.
